Pride Month is celebrated in June every year to honor a tipping point for liberation in the US, the 1969 Stonewall Uprising in Manhattan (Wallenfeldt, n.d.). Pride Month celebrates the LGBT+ community.
People who are not heterosexual (straight) or cisgender may identify as queer. This is a reclaimed slur used as an umbrella term for various sexual and gender identities. Not everyone apart of the LGBTQ+ community uses or even likes the term queer, and that's okay!
We all have overlapping identities that make up who we are, which makes everyone's sexuality and/or gender journey unique. But no matter what, you deserve the freedom to be who you are. It may take time, but support is out there for you to see that you are not alone.
Heterosexual: Do not experience sexual and/or romantic attraction solely to the opposite sex Cisgender: Do not identify with their gender assigned at birth |
Coming Out
"Coming out" involves sharing more of your identity with the rest of the world.
Everyone has their own unique relationship with coming out. Some are proud to share more of their identity with the world and some are frustrated that coming out is needed in the first place. Maybe you're somewhere in between. You may not be ready to come out yet, and that's okay. Exploring the possibility that you may not be completely straight is about what you learn about yourself. You don't need to be "out" to be valid. You are valid wherever you are on your journey in exploring your most authentic self.
As a Western concept, coming out does not benefit everyone. It can contribute to stress regarding being accepted and potentially losing relationships with family in the process. Being queer can mean whatever you want it to.
Sexuality
The feelings you have are valid. This may include experiencing sexual and/or romantic attraction to the same gender, attraction to multiple genders, or even no attraction at all.
Some people who aren't straight find it comforting to have a label other than gay or queer to identify with, like:
Lesbian -- women or non-men attracted to other women or non-men
Bisexual -- attraction to 2 or more genders, may also be considered bicurious if currently questioning
Pansexual -- attraction to people regardless of their gender
Asexual -- a spectrum of identities that involve a lack of sexual attraction and/or decreased interest in sex
Many other labels are out there and may describe you better. It may take time to find the best one for you, if that's what you want. However, you don't need a label to be you or to be valid.
There's nothing wrong with taking the time to explore your sexuality and concluding that you are straight! |
Sex and Gender
Sex and gender are often confused to be the same thing. Your sex refers to the genitalia you were born with. However, infants are then assigned as male or female at birth based on their genitalia, when gender is about what you feel in your brain. Some of the terms below relate to some, but not all, gender identities.
Transgender -- don't identify with the gender assigned at birth
Note that not all trans people fully transition, and they aren't any less valid for it
Intersex -- when the reproductive system or genitalia do not completely align with the binary of male or female
Nonbinary -- male and female are binary identities, so nonbinary refers to everything else that isn't solely male or female
Note that this refers to everything outside of the binary, it does not make gender trinary
Your gender identity may not correspond with what society expects your gender expression to look like. For example, a cis woman may prefer to dress more masculinely, and they can still be cis, and there is nothing wrong with that.
We have all always used pronouns like she/her, he/him, and they/them. Some people prefer using neopronouns. When someone decides to change their pronouns, this does not necessarily mean that their gender has changed. Pronouns are about feeling comfortable with how you are referred to.
Supporting the LGBTQ+ Community
You may have people in your lives exploring their sexuality and/or gender identity. You may not understand it but still want to make sure they know they are supported. Below are some tips to make this effort for them.
Thank them for sharing this part of their identity with you
Tell them that they are loved
Educate yourself and unlearn biases
Talk about it and ask questions when you're both ready
Start incorporating gender-neutral language into your speech
Donate to nonprofit organizations that focus on queer lives, like The Trevor Project
Make sure they have somewhere to go for significant holidays to help them feel a sense of community
You know who you are. Don't let others make you doubt yourself.
Until next time,
Raquel
References
Wallenfeldt, J. (n.d.). Why is Pride Month celebrated in June? Encyclopedia Britannica. Retrieved from https://www.britannica.com/story/why-is-pride-month-celebrated-in-june
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